I want to be part of you while I still can

I hate being in love. Not because its so good. But because I always end up hurt. So maybe I should just give up on love because heartbreak is just to much for me to bear. I always fall for the wrong people. They are too pretty or a jerk or live too far away or just don’t like me at all. So what’s the point of it anyway? I donno maybe I need to wait it out or maybe I’m right that love is just some myth made up for storys

I fail at life. Period. I don’t think I’m doing enough with my life. I spend to much time alone. Oddly enough it dosent useally bother me I like solitude. But I don’t know. I feel like there’s some big missing part in my life. So what do I do? Am I supposed to be nicer? Possibly. Maybe I just need to find something more fullfiling. Because every night trying to go to sleep but I can’t because I have that empty feeling in my stomach does not sit well with me. Not at all.